This week’s news? Dating apps are losing users. And honestly, I think it’s about time.
I’m Jacqui Baker, matchmaker and dating mentor for singles over 50, and I’ve spent years helping people work their way around the world of modern dating. Let me tell you – most dating apps haven’t done you any favours.
Yes, they’ve made meeting people easier in theory, but they’ve also taught you to look for love in all the wrong ways. Swiping left on a potential soulmate because their profile picture isn’t perfect? That’s not progress – that’s a bad habit, and I see it all the time.
So, with dating apps losing their shine, now is the perfect moment to break free from those old habits and embrace a smarter, more genuine approach to dating.
The Bad Habits Dating Apps Have Taught You
If you’ve been on a dating app, you probably think you know what you’re doing. But here’s the truth: most of my clients come to me with habits that make finding a real connection almost impossible.
Here’s what these apps have done:
Turned You Into a Snap-Judgment Machine:
Dating apps train you to make decisions based on the most superficial things:
He’s wearing sunglasses in all his photos. Left swipe:
She doesn’t have kids, so we won’t have anything in common. Nope:
"His bio says he likes fishing. Ugh, boring. Pass: (one I had lately & now they are committed)
These split-second decisions are robbing you of opportunities to meet amazing people who could genuinely light up your life.
Reinforced Your Checklist Mentality: Apps make it too easy to filter people out based on a laundry list of “must-haves.” You’re convinced you’re being selective, but what you’re actually doing is eliminating potential partners over details that don’t matter in the long run.
Made You Think Love Is About Perfection: Let me say this loud and clear: there’s no such thing as a perfect match. Apps condition you to think that the next swipe could bring someone better, and you end up stuck in a cycle of endless scrolling, never satisfied.
The Soulmate You Swiped Left On:
Here’s a story I hear far too often. A client comes to me frustrated, saying, “There’s no one out there for me!” We sit down, review their app history, and what do we find? They’ve swiped left on people who could have been exactly what they’re looking for – all because of something silly.
One client dismissed a potential match because he wore Crocs in one of his photos. Another refused to meet someone because they lived 15 minutes further away than her ideal radius. Both missed out on great connections because they were stuck in the shallow mindset dating apps encourage.
This is one of the biggest challenges I face when mentoring my clients: undoing the damage apps have done and teaching them to focus on what really matters.
What Really Matters in Dating
Let’s cut through the noise. Here’s what you need to focus on if you want to find love in this new chapter of your life:
Look Beyond the Profile: A dating profile is just a snapshot – it doesn’t tell you everything about a person. When you meet someone, pay attention to how they make you feel.
Do they make you laugh?
Do you feel comfortable and seen?
These things matter far more than their hobbies or how well they wrote their bio.
Ditch the Checklist: Yes, you should have standards. But if you’re ticking off boxes like you’re hiring an employee, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. Shared values, chemistry, and emotional connection should outweigh superficial details every time.
Present the Best Version of Yourself: Your profile needs to reflect who you really are – your personality, your passions, and your energy. It’s not about being perfect; it’s about being authentic and sparking curiosity in the right people.
What the Decline of Dating Apps Means for You:
With fewer people relying on apps, there’s a shift happening – one that’s great news for singles over 50.
More people are looking for authentic ways to meet, whether it’s through local events, hobby groups, or mutual friends. This is your chance to break free from the swipe-and-judge cycle and embrace something more real.
But let me be clear: this isn’t about sitting back and waiting for love to find you. If you want to meet someone, you need to put yourself out there. That means attending events, trying new activities, and saying yes to opportunities.
How I Can Help You Find Love Without the Apps:
As a matchmaker and mentor, my goal is to help you unlearn the bad habits apps have taught you and rediscover what real connection looks like. We’ll work together to:
Create a profile (online or offline) that reflects the real you.
Focus on finding partners who align with your values and goals.
Break the cycle of snap judgments and start seeing people for who they are.
Dating after 50 isn’t about competing with younger generations or trying to fit into a digital world that wasn’t designed for you. It’s about being yourself, being open to possibilities, and letting love/companionship/friendship (whatever is meant to make you happy at this stage in your life) unfold.
Feeling Stuck? Let’s Get You Back on Track:
I’ve shared all this advice to help older singles like you work your way around the dating world with clarity and confidence – because I know how frustrating it can be to feel like you’re going in circles. If you’re ready to reset, rethink your approach, and finally achieve your goal of finding a real connection, then get in touch.
I’d love to help you get back on track and make this next chapter your best one yet.
Jacqui Baker Over-50s Matchmaker & Dating Mentor
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